Please note: this review is for the 2006 season rather than the current season.

Bear Den Haunted Woods - CLOSED -

by louiscyphre after attending on Friday, October 20, 2006 at about 4:30 p.m.

Fun Factor: Medium Fear Factor: Medium

Review

Signage / Visibility / Location

It's kind of out of the way, but well-lit. The parking area is all grass, so it was pretty muddy when we were there; dress appropriately and wear appropriate shoes, 'cause mine got covered in mud. I think it's one of those farms where they have animals you can pet and/or view and you can get pumpkins and stuff.

Wait Area / Line Entertainment

Waiting area is kind of non-existent; you just wait in line outside, so if it's cold or raining, be prepared. They do have a weird little playground with cast-off, old-school McDonaldland playground equipment (!), like a giant Hamburger Cop (I don't remember his name, though I believe he was the nemesis of the Hamburglar) head with steel bars for teeth...Ticket building is kind of cool, hanging antlers and old farm tools nailed to the ceiling all over. They sell food in the ticket building and there are tables to sit down and eat, though you need to wait in line outside to get to the haunt. Very cool feature is that when you reach the front of the line, you get into a filthy hearse and are driven to the haunt location proper. Our wait was relatively short, probably 20 minutes.

Most Unique

the bathtub, the hallway of hanging dolls, the "Pain is God" screed scrawled on one of the houses.

Actors' Performance

Actors are fine, though mostly just loud; there are an awful lot of them, and it seemed overrun with ghouls at times. There's not much character or acting beyond "Bleargh!" I don't think that's what they're focusing on, though, it's more about startling you. Actors seemed kind of combative, actually (one of them yelled at some kids on the rope bridge while we were there), so I guess that was intimidating in a certain way...

Appropriate For

Probably for older kids, 'cause there's a lot of loudness and gore.

Summary

This one's down and dirty; it's very cacophonous and seems more focused on overwhelming you with sound, enclosed spaces, and general overall nastiness. There are lots of power tools making lots of noise on lots of thin walls that you're cramped in between, which becomes numbing after a while. Terrific entrance, though, walking on a rope bridge over a pond with torches lighting your way; there are also plenty of bonfires along the way if you get cold. Very long haunt, took a long time to get through, although pacing was kind of lacking and we got stuck sandwiched in between other groups many times. The ride in the hearse was cool, especially when it was attacked.

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April 19th, 2024 4:20 a.m. CDT 24.01